Category Archives: Maturity

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The Box

Gift_box
They had married young. He was twenty and she, eighteen. Ten months after their wedding their first baby arrived, and the next one followed fifteen months later. Now both their children were out of the home, and he was just settling down to enjoy the new phase of life with his wife. They had plans to go on all those cruises they had previously not been able take. Then a couple of weeks before their twenty-fifth anniversary he got a shock of his life. Tucked away at the bottom of her closet was a box full of letters and cards from another man.

For a few seconds, life stood still before him and then the ache of betrayal jangled violently through his entire body and soul. He carefully carried the pink scented gift box and placed it on the blanket chest. Peering at the contents in one letter, it was apparent that this illicit affair had been ongoing when she worked at the hospital. He couldn’t understand how this was happening to him. As far as he knew, theirs was one of the most stable marriages around. This finding tore into his heart like a sharp knife. He really wanted to confront her with this box, but on second thoughts he returned the overwhelming evidence exactly where he had found it.

He was sitting at the kitchen table when she came back from the beauty salon. She was still as beautiful as when he had first laid his eyes on her. Although his heart was heavy he stood up and took her in his arms. Trembling and fighting back his tears, he mustered enough strength to say, “After all these years, I, Rodgers, still take you Armella, to be my wife, to have and to hold, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; until death do us part.”

She was a little puzzled by this very touching moment; however she savored it and reaffirmed her own vows back to him.

Later that night when she reached for her box of secrets, there, on top of it was a note from her husband:

“My life is so beautiful with you in it.”

Armella’s legs gave way beneath her and she sat on the floor weeping. She knew he had found out. She was extremely remorseful.
After gaining some composure, she took the box into the den. Rodgers was there reclined in his favorite seat watching a game. She tossed it into the fire. They both watched it go up in flames.

“Honey, I am very sorry…” she began.

He switched off the television and motioned her to sit beside him.
Gazing into her eyes he said, “I am too, but we can start a new box – our own memory box.”

So they did and called it “1 Peter 4:8”.

Last week they celebrated their fiftieth anniversary.

***

Let us not be afraid to call sin sin, but let us not be slow to forgive it and to look past it. It’s amazing how much beauty we can see and how much further we can go together when we choose to close our eyes to our spouse’s faults.

Copyright © 2014 Dee Kyalo-Mwanzia

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Dee Kyalo is the author of Crushing Invisible Barriers and Looking Up . Check out the cool reviews and ‘like’ us on Facebook! Both books are available here now.

If It Looks Like A Frog

frog kissing
The idea that you have to kiss several frogs before you get to your prince(ss) charming is not scriptural; it is not godly, yet many settle for it. I read something in my Bible; you might have come across it too. It goes something like this: “If human beings (being as evil as they are) know how to give good gifts to their children, how much more will my Father in heaven give good gifts to me who asks Him!” In other words, you cannot ask for bread and then He gives you a stone (I mean a deadbeat!!); you cannot ask for a fish only to be given a snake (Get it? a snake! That’s right!) (Ref. Matthew 7:9-11 NLT)

There is a reason you keep getting frogs. Search it. What is it that attracts frogs to you or vice versa? You MUST get rid of it. This is serious…

And I saw three evil spirits that looked like frogs leap from the mouths of the dragon, the beast, and the false prophet. – Revelation 16:13 NLT.

MJS FROGS

Heeey! If it looks like a frog…BEWARE! (Seriously, why are you even kissing it in the first place?)

Remember the 10 plagues of Egypt in Exodus? Frogs (Exodus 8:6) was one of them and they were everywhere! (How annoying.) Pharaoh summoned Moses and Aaron to pray to the Lord for the frogs to go away. So Moses asks, “When do you want me to pray for you?” Now, brace yourself for Pharaoh’s answer… “Tomorrow!” Say what?!
What would one want one more night with the frogs for? (Exodus 8:10)

Unfortunately this is the same situation in the lives of the ‘frog kissers’. God sends someone to help you. They ask: “Sister/brother when can we pray for you to deliver you out of this problem?”

“Tomorrow.” (Translation: Just one more night with the frog, please!)

Mmmhh… Alright then. We will respect your choice.

Identifying and Getting Rid of Frogs
To get rid of frogs, you must identify them:
* Frogs have rough, harsh, coarse voice instead of a calm small still voice
* Frogs are a symbol of complaining or reproach as opposed to praise and gratitude
* Frogs are a symbol of impudence=cocky boldness (contemptuous)
* Frogs are a symbol of empty loquacity (too much talk) and very little listening if any.
* Since the frog lives in mud/marshes=symbol of those who live in sin/pollution (and have no desire to leave),
* Frogs may not eat much but drink much=symbol of drunkards
* The frog swells his size, and distends his cheeks=symbol of pride
* The frog endures all changes of the season cold and heat, summer, winter, rain, frost and can easily go for a night vigil and fool you if you’re not prayerful because they are capable of clubbing all night too. Have you ever wondered how a saved sister ends up marrying a…? Well, you get it.

Getting rid of frogs is easy. Get godly wisdom and it will change your fragrance. This wisdom puts the Jesus aroma on you. It is what makes you know not to kiss frogs. There is no right frog – and you get this from the scriptures. The wisdom of God sets you above, it raises your standard and you stink no more! And it will be said concerning you, Baby, you sure do smell sweet! The question of whether or not it is the right frog does not arise. It is a frog. A child of God has no business kissing frogs. Period!

Beloved, God has shown you, now it’s up to you.

Copyright © 2014 Dee Kyalo-Mwanzia

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Dee Kyalo is the author of Crushing Invisible Barriers and Looking Up . Check out the cool reviews and ‘like’ us on Facebook! Both books are available here now.

6 quick signs that you’re in a relationship with a woman – not a girl

girlvwoman

A godly man can distinguish the difference between a woman that falls in love with him and a girl that falls head over heels with the external trappings of his ‘office’, a woman that is positioned to view him properly and a girl that is possessed to view his property, a woman that respects him and a girl that inspects his every move…
girlwoman

My dear gentle brothers, here are some quick signs you can factor in that can aid make your decision easier:

1. A woman may have issues but she is wise enough not to leave them unresolved. Past issues that have not been resolved are often referred to as baggage. If she hasn’t learned to take up her baggage and deal with it as opposed to uncaringly loading it on others, she’s not yet a woman. A woman has learned to turn from her selfish ways, take up her cross and follow your lead. (Ref. Matthew 16:24 NLT)
2. A woman is complete, secure and independent by virtue of what she has received and therefore understands that she has everything she needs for living a godly life. She is in a relationship not because she is afraid to be single but because she’s attracted to you and she believes that this is an opportunity to give and share and develop a high quality life, together. (Ref. 2 Peter 1:3 NLT)
3. A woman knows who and whose she is – a crown of beauty and a royal diadem; and carries herself out as such. (Ref. Isaiah 62:3 ESV)
4. A woman doesn’t have the diva complex. She doesn’t throw her weight around delivering harsh words and making unreasonable finger-snapping demands thinking that the world revolves around her. She doesn’t think herself better than she really is. (Ref. Romans 12:3 NLT)
5. A woman is confident and powerful but not proud and arrogant (which is a manifestation of lack of a sound mind). She can voice her opinions and concerns without having a nasty tone or attitude – she displays love, grace and self-control. (Ref. 2 Timothy 1:7 KJV)
6. A woman is not only interested in your goals but encourages you to pursue them. She doesn’t tear you down but builds you up; trusting you to make the right decisions in your own life. This is her lifestyle: She lets everything she says be good and helpful, so that her words will be an encouragement to you. (Ref. Ephesians 4:29 NLT)

Here are more bonus tips…

A woman depends on God

A woman depends on God

Take a peak into a bachelor’s journal and please feel free to share your input.

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Copyright © 2014 Dee Kyalo-Mwanzia.

Author of Crushing Invisible Barriers and Looking Up . Check out the cool reviews and ‘like’ us on Facebook! Both books are available here now.

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Who Am I?

Who am IWHO AM I?
I have no respect for justice.
I maim without killing.
I break hearts and ruin lives.
I am cruel and malicious and gather strength with age.
The more I am quoted, the more I am believed.
I flourish at every level of society.
My victims are helpless.
They cannot protect themselves against me because I have no name and no face.
To track me down is impossible.
The harder you try, the more elusive I become.
I’m nobody’s friend.
Once I tarnish a reputation, it is never the same.
I topple governments and ruin marriages.
I destroy careers and cause heartache and sleepless nights.
I wreck churches and separate Christians.
I spawn suspicion and generate grief, make innocent people cry on their pillows.
Even my name hisses.
I am gossip. 1

The words of a gossip are like choice morsels;
they go down to the inmost parts. – Proverbs 18:8 NIV

1. Charles Kimball, Gossip: The 8th Deadly Sin Proverbs 18:8

Let There Be

yellow-sunset-in-the-middle-of-the-ocean
Last Tuesday a dear sister was called to new life following treatment for breast cancer. We experienced tension in big and little ways, obvious and subtle ways every single day as she went through the tough process.

I learned that as hard as we might try to pursue health and well-being, the chaos of un-wellness can invade as an unwelcome intruder. It took my sister only 8 months from diagnosis to departure.

It is in confusing moments like this when God seems so far away. In tumultuous situations like this one finds it very difficult to pray. Nothing makes sense in such turmoil. It feels to me like chaos is trying to move in, take me over and swallow me up. Everything is in disarray and I do not know where to start.

Although it is very difficult to understand why a young wife – only 34 years old, and a mother of two, aged 6 (almost 7) and 4, should die, I rejoice because blessed are the dead who die in the Lord (Revelation 14:13 NIV).

It appears as though nothing good can come out of the chaos that sickness, disease and death can cause.

“Have compassion on me, Lord, for I am weak.” I cry out in desperation. (Psalm 6:2 NLT)

“My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in your weakness.” He answers. (2 Corinthians 12:9 NIV).

It suddenly dawns on me that order can only be experienced in the midst of shambles. In the beginning, when the earth was formless, empty and darkness was over the surface of the deep, the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters and He began creating something good. Let there be…and it was! (Genesis 1:1-31 NIV and Genesis 2:1-2 NIV).

How else can we experience light save there is darkness? How can we receive healing unless there is sickness? How can we receive a new body unless the current one is first taken down? (2 Corinthians 5:1-10 NLT). Peace be still can only be said in the midst of a storm (Mark 4:39 NKJV). Whenever the Spirit of God moves, there occurs creation of order and goodness out of disorder and chaos. In this case, a seed has been planted and we wait for the Lord as we say, “Let there be the germination of a new plant in the land of the living!”

Is anyone facing a similar situation? Let there be hope and encouragement as you watch this powerful video!

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Copyright © 2014 Dee Kyalo-Mwanzia. All Rights Reserved.
Dee Kyalo is the
Author of Crushing Invisible Barriers and Looking Up . Check out the cool reviews and ‘like’ us on Facebook! Both books are available here now.

Wolves Don’t Lose Sleep Over Opinions Of Sheep

wolf-sheep“Wolves don’t lose sleep over the opinions of sheep” is a quote that crossed my mind today. Generally, I’ve heard it said that the meaning of this quote is: spend less time worrying about what others think. I’ll approach it from a different angle.  Both wolves and shepherds love sheep to death – the difference is this: one will take the sheep’s life while the other will give his life for the sheep. Assume the wolf here is the enemy and the sheep is the Christian. The Bible in Psalm 100:3 says, we are the sheep of His pasture.

Why are we sheep? God created us as social beings and like sheep we tend to flock and follow. The flocking and following instinct of sheep is so strong that it caused the death of 400 sheep in 2006 in eastern Turkey. The sheep plunged to their death after one of the sheep tried to cross a 15-meter deep ravine, and the rest of the flock followed. Apart from being docile and meek, interestingly, sheep are notoriously noted for going astray. They get lost easily. We too can get lost at the drop of a hat and we have no ability to find ourselves. Did you ever get lost and couldn’t find yourself? Isaiah 53:6 says, We all, like sheep, have gone astray, each of us has turned to his own way; and the LORD has laid on him the iniquity of us all. That is how we were without Christ. We were helpless.

The first biblical comparison of the people to sheep without a shepherd comes in the book of Numbers 27:16-18, it is from the prayer of Moses as he begs the Lord to appoint a leader for the people after his death. Listen: May the Lord the God of the spirits of all flesh provide a man, that may be over this multitude: And may go out and in before them, and may lead them out, or bring them in: lest the people of the Lord be as sheep without a shepherd. In answer to his petition, the Lord appointed Joshua the son of Nun to guide the people into the land of the promise.

Sheep are passive creatures, and can do little for themselves: so can believers in the work of their salvation. They have not of themselves more knowledge of the saving way than sheep, and so cannot walk but as they are taught and led. Sheep are the most dependent creatures in the world. All their happiness is in the goodness, care, and wisdom of their shepherd. This ought to give us an idea of how God wants us to lead our lives as Christians. We ought to depend on Jesus who is our Shepherd. In the Old Testament sheep were raised for sacrifice. All of them were raised for death. We are raised for life! In the Old Testament the sheep died for the sins of the shepherd; in the New Testament, the Shepherd has died for the sins of the sheep!

The free online dictionary defines opinion as a belief or conclusion held with confidence but not substantiated by positive knowledge or proof. I dare say, then, no wonder the wolf will not lose any sleep over it. We, the sheep, need something more tangible than just an opinion. Opinions lets others know just how limited you are. Every opinion has a limit. Usually it is tied to ones five senses. In other words, opinions have nothing to do with faith. Faith is not limited. Faith is not dependent on feelings or on our senses. Your faith in what God has spoken is what silences the enemy. The wolf will lose sleep over your unshakeable faith is the infallible Word of God!

Jesus said, “Beware of false prophets, who come to you in sheep’s clothing but inwardly are ravenous wolves.”Matthew 7:15. To me, this is a challenge to be alert.

Some shepherds might look very appealing on the outside, but in reality they are corrupt wolves. Yes, they love the sheep but for their own selfish gain. They will not lose any sleep over your pain or hurt. They won’t care that you hunger or thirst. They’re on the lookout for what’s in it for them.  Jesus expects His sheep to be watchful so that they can easily identify these wolves. Sheep deserve shepherds with Christlike characters. (Jeremiah 3:15). We need pastors who love their flock with the love of Christ. If you can’t stand the smell (problems, issues etc) of sheep, you really shouldn’t be a shepherd.

One of the ways we can identify the wolves is this:

Are their predictions true? A true prophet will predict things and those things will come to pass. A wolf will only guess. Many times their prophecies are false and they will give explanations for it then reset the whole charade with new dates. Here’s what the Bible says, But the prophet who presumes to speak a word in my name that I have not commanded him to speak, or who speaks in the name of other gods, that same prophet shall die.’ And if you say in your heart, ‘How may we know the word that the LORD has not spoken?’ – when a prophet speaks in the name of the LORD, if the word does not come to pass or come true, that is a word that the LORD has not spoken; the prophet has spoken it presumptuously. You need not be afraid of him. – Deuteronomy 18:20-22

To state other ways briefly, in addition to the above, if their predictions are not Biblically sound – that is a wolf. If their testimony isn’t Christlike – that is a wolf. If their prophecies are geared toward their personal financial gain – that is a wolf. If they are opportunists; only showing up where they can prey versus pray fleece versus feed – that is a wolf.

When sheep are armed with this knowledge rather than just opinion then the wolves will indeed lose sleep!

*This article was written by Dee Kyalo, Author of Crushing Invisible Barriers
This book has some pretty cool reviews!
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Baby, you sure do smell sweet!

shadow

Baby, you sure do smell sweet!

Oh, Baby!
What a scent! What an aroma!
What a perfume! What a fragrance!
So special… always exceptional
So pleasing…always satisfying
Into the heart and moment
Into heaven and eternity
Captivating and enchanting!
Charming and entrancing!
You sure do smell sweet!

Now that I have your attention, I will be straight with you. It’s not about the kind of romance you’re thinking of. So let’s get to it.

And you shall burn the whole (entire) ram on the altar. It is a burnt offering to the Lord; it is a sweet aroma, an offering made by fire to the Lord. (Exodus 29:18)
aroma

I came across five major sacrifices in the Old Testament:
1. The burnt offering
2. The peace offering
3. The meal offering
4. The sin offering
5. The trespass offering

When these five offerings were burnt as God instructed they became a sweet aroma to Him. Even though the Old Testament was operating on the Law, the sacrifices that God approved all represented His Son. The first three sacrifices symbolize the flawlessness of Jesus which were offered to God on our behalf. The sin and trespass offerings represented the guilt of our sins and trespasses that were put on Jesus when He died in our place. We are in the New Testament dispensation – the Grace era, so we don’t have to actually kill rams and burn them on the altar. Jesus is the Lamb that was slain upon the altar. Praise God for that! When burnt on His Holy altar, all these sacrifices became a sweet aroma to God. With certainty, we know that the Lord Jesus Christ as our sacrifice was a soothing and sweet smell to His Father when He died for us.

When Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego were thrown into the fiery furnace for not bowing down to King Nebuchadnezzar’s golden image, the hair of their head was not singed nor were the garments affected, and the smell of fire was not on them! (Daniel 3:27)

Sometimes in the course of life, we go through one form of fire or another. We can either try to spray some febreeze to mask the smell or open the windows and let it diffuse into a less concentrated environment. One thing is definite: Anytime flesh is burned there must be a smell. When we go through a burning, just like the burnt offerings in the Old Testament, we should give off a sweet aroma with every burning of our carnality. When we face the fires of life we cannot just burn part of our flesh. We are supposed to yield our entire self – “burn the entire animal”, in so doing we allow the acceptable aroma rise up to heaven, for “it is a pleasing aroma, a special gift presented to the Lord.” (Exodus 29:18)

As a Believer, you have a Savior who was burnt on God’s Holy altar. The aroma He emitted, that pleased His Father, should be on you. Therefore when you go through the fires of life – like the three Hebrew boys you will not come out smelling of smoke! Instead you emit the sweet Jesus aroma. What you’re going through today does not have to surround the rest of your life. It shall be said concerning you, “Baby, you sure do smell sweet!”

Who wants to be a millionaire?

MillionaireLogoI just started a game of Jigty puzzles on my phone and a thought came through my mind: “What if I could solve my life’s puzzles in 20 minutes or less?” Honestly, I really wish I could. You see I have issues that I would like settled yesterday but in the same breath I’d like to say that thus far God has been very faithful to me. It is human nature (I think), to feel somewhat impatient with some levels in one’s life. When you experience monotony, it’s natural to feel like you want to move to the next (or a different) level – quickly!

Single people may want to marry in a hurry.
Married people may want to call it off in a huff.
Teenagers may want to be as free as the rent they don’t pay.
Children may want to grow up as fast as the speed of light!

I think all that is “normal” – to some extent. The real issue here is how you compare what you want against the chart of what you should have.

From time to time I get Facebook inbox messages and emails from people asking me to stand with them in prayer for certain issues of life. The complexity of some concerns can be overwhelming but when you realize that humans can only do so much, you rest your hope somewhere else. I have become conscious of the fact that life is not a Jigty puzzle so daily I learn to put my hope and trust in God. As I take this faith journey, I do so with the determination of extending hope and encouragement to those I come across.

“What if I could solve my life’s puzzles in 20 minutes or less?”

“What if I could solve my life’s puzzles in 20 minutes or less?”

In the course of providing counsel, I received a message from a young man who lost his whole family in a car wreck. “I have no wife, no kids and no home. I am thinking of committing suicide.” He writes. This is intricate! What do you tell a man who has lost his will to live? Where do you start? I wish I could tell him, “Pick up this piece and put it to the left, then move this one to the right and voila!” For sure, life is not a rehearsal, especially where human life is concerned – and hanging by the thread. You cannot just come back and say, “Oops, I guess you shouldn’t have moved that piece.” It might be too late for that. Therefore, I am learning that when God sends someone your way, His main purpose is to preserve life. However, it may not be as literal as saving a person from physical death. People face a whole range of situations and you have a solution to at least one.

This brings me to something Jesus said. “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.” – John 10:10. If we are followers of Christ, we too must give life and strive to give it to the full to those we come across.

Many are lost, find one
Many are wasting, preserve one
Many are hungry, feed one
Many are in bondage, free one
Many are hopeless, encourage one
Many are frustrated, help one
Many are in darkness, enlighten one
Many are hurting, comfort one
Many are dying, save one

Okay, this was not about money but souls. You’re not a millionaire by having a million dollars. You’re a millionaire by influencing a million people for the glory of God. So, do you want to be a millionaire?

[Inspired by John 10:10, Matthew 5:13-16]

*This article was written by Dee Kyalo, Author of Crushing Invisible Barriers
This book has some pretty cool reviews!
Like it on Facebook!